Let me tell you a quick story that will help you understand how to cultivate home one step at a time.
In the year 1519, Hernán Cortés arrived in the “New World” with 600 men, and upon arrival, made history by “burning his ships.” This sent a clear message to his men: There is no turning back! Two years later, he succeeded in his complete conquest of the Aztec empire.
While that might have been an epic move for Cortés and his crew, it is a terrible idea for our homes. Seriously. We don’t need drastic, no-way-out approaches when it comes to cultivating home. What we need is easy, sustainable systems.
All-or-Nothing Thinking: A One-Way Ticket to Overwhelm
Too often, we get caught up in an all-or-nothing mentality. We think, If I can’t do it all perfectly, why even start? Or maybe, I need to declutter my entire house in one weekend or it’s a failure! Sound familiar? That kind of thinking is exhausting. It leads to decision fatigue, burnout, and the occasional desire to run away and live in a tent by the river. That is probably a little extreme but you know what I’m saying.
But here’s the truth: Creating a home that feels good doesn’t require burning the boats. It requires small, consistent steps that build on each other.
The easiest and in my opinion only way to get out of overwhelm is to take a step. It doesn’t have to be a big step, in fact it is better if it’s not. When we do one small thing we take ourselves out of the spin. When we do one small thing we get energy and evidence to do the next small thing.
Once you start momentum, energy and inspiration show up. You might think you need momentum, energy and inspiration to start but that is completely backwards. You need to use a little willpower to get started then the momentum, energy and inspiration will show up.
My Experience with "Burning the Boats"
I have volunteered with my church and helped family and friends in what I used to think was the best way: going all in, burning the boats, doing everything in one big swoop. I would dive into their homes, clean, declutter, and organize with all the enthusiasm of a home makeover show. And let me tell you, it was amazing! The transformations were awesome, and the sense of accomplishment was real.
But here’s what happened over time: Many of those I helped couldn’t maintain what was done for them. Not because they didn’t appreciate it, but because the changes weren’t built into their routines. It might not of even been changes they wanted or asked for. The systems weren’t tailored to their real, everyday lives. And, let’s be honest, sometimes the desire was mine more than theirs. If you don’t truly want the change, it won’t last.
The Cost of One-and-Done Organization
Could you hire someone to come in and overhaul your home? Absolutely. If you have the budget for it, professionals can create systems for you. But here’s the kicker: Systems aren’t one and done. They need trial, and personalizing. The most effective home organization isn’t about a magic, overnight transformation, it’s about building a lifestyle of small, maintainable habits.
Think about it this way: You wouldn’t hire a personal trainer for one epic workout and expect to be fit forever. The same principle applies to your home. It’s not about a one, time deep clean. It’s about creating routines that make home life easier every day.
So What Do We Do? (Hint: No Fire Required!)
Let go of dramatic measures and focus on real, doable steps, instead of burning the boats. Here are a few ideas that will help you get the ball rolling.
1. Start Small with Habit Stacking
Big changes don’t stick unless they’re built into what we already do. That’s where habit stacking comes in. Attach a new habit to an existing one. For example:
While waiting for the kids to make their way to the kitchen for breakfast or scriptures, put away the clean dishes.
When brushing your teeth, look yourself in the eye and remind you how amazing you are, flaws and all.
Before heading to bed, do a quick 5-minute reset in the living room.
Simple shifts make a big difference over time. Do you have the desire to spring clean your home, (or fall clean) but it seems overwhelming? Check out my spring cleaning checklist. Do you have to do everything on the list to make it work for you? Heck to the NO but it will help you get out of overwhelm and get the ball rolling.
2. Identify Your Pain Points
Instead of trying to tackle everything, focus on what causes the most frustration in your home. Is it the endless pile of shoes by the door? The kitchen counters that seem to attract clutter like a magnet? The laundry situation that feels like an insurmountable mountain? Start there. Fix one thing at a time instead of setting the entire house ablaze.
What is one small thing you can do to improve the situation? After you tackle that one thing, if it’s working for you do one more small thing. Do that over and over and over. It isn’t hard, taking small steps on the road to big results. Remember what I said earlier, the way to deal with overwhelm is by taking a small step.
Actions bring results but it also brings the confidence to take more action.
3. Take It One Space and One Step at a Time
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and your home won’t magically transform overnight either. Tackle one small space at a time:
One drawer, not the whole kitchen.
One shelf, not the entire closet.
One habit, not an entirely new lifestyle all at once.
The beauty of this approach? It builds momentum. Small wins lead to bigger wins, and before you know it, your home starts to feel more like the peaceful, functional space you crave. You can even get your family on board. They may not love it at first but once they understand what is expected, in a loving and encouraging manner, they will become more and more helpful.
Maybe you want to declutter and edit your home, doing it one space and step at a time will bring lasting and rewarding results. Here is a 5 week declutter guide with a bonus how to declutter 30 items in 30 days.
No Burning Boats Needed—Just Fresh Starts
The best part? You don’t need to wait for Monday, the first of the month, or the next new year to begin. You have the chance to start fresh every day, even every hour if needed. No drastic measures, no overwhelming pressure. Just small, consistent actions that add up over time. Check out this blogpost where there is more information about creating easy systems for an organized home.
So let’s leave the dramatic ship burning to history and focus on building the kind of home we truly love. One step, one space, one small habit at a time.
A home that functions in a way that works for your family.
